Sleeping through the night!

God will I ever sleep again?
The Miracle of Birth
Most parents that have been trying and even those that haven't are excited to hear the news about being pregnant. After a long nine months that may or may not have been good, it's time for the new baby to take their place in your family. Ah the miracle of birth! There is a brief experience which may or may not be painful when you are pushing your child through your birth canal and out your vagina, but then it's time to meet your bundle of joy! Then it is time for everyone else to meet your bundle of joy...everyone is oooohing and aaaaaahing over the wonderful addition to your family. You take the baby home to get it acquainted with their new and hopefully permanent living environment, where you will live and grow as a family. During this growth period there are many things that happen or change and continue to happen and change even after they have moved away as adults. Your life is pretty much never the same-and this is a good thing right? Of course it is. However during the long and complicated road to this joy there are many speed bumps that can occur. One of these being the baby that can not sleep through the night.

Sleepless In... Well You Get My Drift!The first months are the most difficult because there are so many things to worry about.. If your baby was premature or had problems at birth, this will worry you for oh the rest of their lives. Even if they end up being the healthiest kids alive you will still have that dreadful fear that at any time the problems they had at birth could resurface and hurt them at any time. Then you have the normal every day worries of a new parent, SIDS being one of them-even though you have the really expensive SIDS monitor that will alert you to them not breathing, let me tell you this is not much comfort to worry wort parents, like myself... Then probably because you coddled them soooo much-especially if this is your first-they can not sleep unless they are sleeping on or with you... This is dangerous because then you and your baby are not getting the quality of sleep you or they need-in their case to develop properly and in your case to function properly. So you go through the motions of trying to make them sleep in their own bed and in their own room... This could go two ways really great or really terrible.

Sleeping In Their Own SpaceThe first attempt will almost definately be a failure. This may be frustrating but stick to it, it will eventually get better -try taking baby steps. The second attempt may not be much better. After the fifth or sixth attempt usually you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Finally you think on the first night they are able to sleep through the night. Finally you are able to rest. If you are one of the lucky many this is the end of your worries-sure you may have a few nights that the baby will keep you up-sickness and other things included below... If you are one of the few unlucky ones this one night of rest is a godsend because for the next few-at least- nights you are going to be ready to dose the baby with cold medication-Do not do this!!!-yes in the past you hear of people putting stuff in babies milk but look at how messed up some people are now a days(may not be all of them that had this done but do you really want to take that chance?) Do not give up hope. Try to relax and keep at it, i know your tired-I have been there and because of my PPD it made me think some awful things, but you have to hang in there and calm yourself down, If you are stressing and frustrated your baby is going to pick up on it and you will be making the situation worse. Your patience and determination will pay off.

The Effort
Okay here is how your night might go... You get the baby to sleep and settled for the night in your arms.. You go to transfer the baby into the crib and they wake up and won't stop crying. You start over. This may go on for quite some time, but finally 2a and your baby is asleep. Yay!! They are in their crib and you are settling down. You close your eyes-bam baby is crying. Yes it is frustrating and yes it seems like it is never going to end. Then it does and you are able to get two hours of sleep. This is why experts tell you to sleep when the baby is sleeping so that you can handle these sleepless frustrating nights. You will try everything from soothing music to light shows projected on their ceilings and all the while you feel as though you are losing you mind and wasting your money. Heck sometimes you even think well maybe they just want to play and once they get it out of their system they will go to sleep and everything will be fine. If you try this make sure you know they may get used to this and it may entice them to keep up acting the way they do. You have to program them like you would a cell phone. Sometimes this is by trial and error. No worries you can always reprogram. It takes time though. Mind you there may be set backs... Don't let these stagger your endless efforts, things will go back to normal.

Sickness Set Backs
If your child is sick-virus, bacterial, fever, whatever it is going to affect theirs and your sleep. This will bring up your feelings of frustration again but try to remember it is not your child's fault they are sick. They can not help it and when they are sick usually that means they want their parents. Sick children demand and deserve there parents attention. Do not overlook symptoms. If your child is crying go through your checklists that your parenting books have helped you make... Does your child have a fever?, do they sound hoarse, are they congested or have a runny nose, is there a change in their personality, etc... all of these (and more not listed) could indicate that your child is sick. If you are unsure call their doctor and the doctor will be able to tell you or see the child to determine the problem. Do not be ashamed or embarrassed to take your child to the doctor or ER. Remember their safety is your number one priority. Besides you know how you feel when your sick, heck my husband still wants his mommy's chicken soup (for that matter I want his mothers chicken soup) when he is sick. Children are designed to need there parents for comforting. Now it is not always because they are sick but other causal factors could include teething, night terrors, storms that have loud thunder, and many other causes that are out of your babies control.

These Things Take Time
Just try to remember that even though this is frustrating and you probably will never get the quality of sleep that you had when you were younger-if you ever had the sleep quality you should-you will be able to enjoy a restful night eventually. In the mean time try and enjoy your child and the time you share with them.

Answered Prayers and the consequences

I have wanted a child for several years now. Even before my husband and I were married, I think I have wanted to be a mother since I was twelve years old. I finally found the man of my dreams and married him had a great career that was on the rise, then all that was left to complete my life goals was to have a baby. Finally we were on our way to finding a home and it fell through. I went for my normal obgyn appointment and told the doctor that I was having unusual menstral cycles. My doctor told me I was infertile and referred me to an infertility specialist that then told me that I had pcos-polycystic ovarian syndrome. In a nutshell I was not ovulating and would need to start a regimen of medications including chlomid to help the process. I was on 5 cycles of the medication when I was about to give up hope and finally the pregnancy test read positive it was the happiest day of my life. This of course is the short version of the agonizing hell I went through. My husband and I had just restarted our search for the perfect house and was about to make an offer on it right before we found out. This was a sign to me that everything was about to fall into place. We did it!...Right!? Well where my prayers were answered in one aspect of my life other aspects started to collapse. Not the worst of which I might add was my career. During the 36 weeks I was pregnant, my feelings about my great career became a back burner to my health. I was always sick-from the pregnancy and from the stress. I had gone into pre term labor at 33 weeks and the doctor put me out of work and on bed rest. Which didn't prevent the toxemia from occuring and forcing the doctors to induce labor at 36 weeks. Luckily my baby girl was beautiful and for the most part healthy only spending a week in the hospital to get her bilirubin levels to normal. All this while the whole thing is wreaking havoc on our finances-nothing really prepares you financially for being a parent and then when it was time to go back to work my husband and I were not prepared to deal with these circumstances. We thought we had it figured out because we didn't have the money to send her to daycare and no support from family or friends(which you know it's not their responsibility anyway) we decided to work opposite shifts. I have sleep apnea and I worked overnight and had to care for the baby during the day so I wasn't getting any sleep and falling asleep behind the wheel. My husband and I decided it was for the best if I quit my job. I miss working and the people I worked with but my family had to come first and I didn't want my daughter to grow up with out a mother.