mood swings

When your dealing with adults it's one thing, you can get away from them or tell them to get a grip or leave you alone but when it comes to your child there is no avoiding mood swings. Amanda can be perfectly happy one minute and the very next second its like her head is going to spin around and she is going to vomit split pea soup. No lie!!! I don't understand it. What is a mother to do in this case? So you spend hours trying to get her in a better mood. Trying everything until you yourself are in a bad mood. I have found that sometimes not always all it takes is a change of scenery. Get her in a different place or around different people and she is great! But then again if you are in that place too long mood swing here she comes...

Thunder and Lightning

I used to love the way lightning looked in the sky especially the electrical storms you would see in the summer. It could be so spectacular. I loved sitting on my parents front porch just watching the sky and meditating on the wonders of it all. Now get me to the furthest corner of the house because I am terrified. I think it is mainly because now I want to protect my daughter. Maybe... Or it could be that I am just scared. I haven't decided yet. Well apparently I am not the only one. My daughter is scared of them. She saw her first one tonight. She screamed so loud it sounded like a cat being tortured. It was horrible and sad. She was practically hyperventilating. Once it died down a little she calmed but lord let me tell you....

sleep deprivation

Being a stay at home mother is very complicated. You have less money coming in, which means you sacrifice more, which means you go out less, which means that you hang out with adult friends less, which means you feel less about yourself, and all this causes you to get less sleep. The only thing you seem to do more of is worry and go crazy!

One of these days I will be normal again. Until then I will settle for the pride I take in my daughter!

The one thing I did to pamper/treat myself today was hang out with my best friend for an hour.

clapping hands

You lose the meaning of happiness I think as an adult. You forget something as simple as clapping hands as a show of happiness. My daughter today clapped her hands for the first time and it reminded me of when I was a kid and how everything made me happy. Now a days it really takes a special even, like my daughter crawling to make me clap in joy. Where have those days gone? Down the drain with the money that we send towards bills and stuff. It's crazy how much money problems can bring down your sense of everything really. I think that it is time to bring back the happiness. Every day I am going to try to do one thing (at least) to make myself happy and screw every thing else.

stay home work

Is there anything you can honestly do these days to work from home really???? Some say yes of course there are all those infomercials and websites but which are schemes and which aren't? Recently-quite recently I might add, I have been looking into doing something from home with no luck so far. My eight month old-which by the way is crawling-yeah!!!!...is starting to be a little more independent which would allow me to work from home if I could find something. So far I am finding a lot of different ones. Now mind you so far the one's I have found would normally be considered schemes. However I have found that if you have enough money to put out it would actually make you a considerable profit... If you had a lot of money to put out and don't get sucked in to just giving up your money with out putting the effort behind it. Here's is the problem. While being pushed into giving up your money and then left to do it on your own, you get frustrated and feel as though you would rather give up then be raped for more money that you don't have. Well there are a few that are worth looking into for little to no start up money. You just need to know where to look. Also beware if it say's it is free or little down beware of the membership fees which will kick in after 7 days.

Getting back on the horse

Most women have told me that it was very difficult for them to "get back on the horse" after having had their babies. I don't know what the big deal is... I didn't find it that difficult at all. Sure it was a little uncomfortable at first but you just gave birth to a baby. Things were pushed out and stretched so far that it may never feel the same again. After having my baby we tried at 4 weeks and it was uncomfortable to say the least. I thought to myself if I didn't want to give it up to my husband this would be the perfect opportunity to get out of doing it again. I can see the temptation to use excuses. If you are just not that into your husband or significant other get out now because it will only get worse. If you want to work on it I know it may not be comfortable at first... however this doesn't mean it can't be great as long as both partners are willing to make a commitment to each other's comfort. I love it and would never be able to give it up. I will stop enjoying my husband's company when I am dead. If you aren't able to enjoy it any more then it could be a medical problem and should speak to a doctor. Don't let your relationship go by the wayside because you feel your obligations are held and it is no longer necessary. A lot of divorces happen because people say the passion is gone from their marriage. Try to put a stop to it!!! If the obgyn can't help you try looking into a shrink-unless you are absolutely physically impaired and doing it will kill you-you should really work on this!

Father's Day!

I love to make my husband cry, in good ways mind you!!! Today was the best yet. I was up all night with the baby and finally got her to sleep around 9a and started making my husband breakfast. It was yummy we had pancakes and scrambled eggs and ham stake-the real kind with the bone and all mmm mmm! Then I gave him the fathers day card from me. It was sappy but didn't get him. Finally Amanda woke up and gave him his card. I let her give it to him it was so cute. He starts reading the card and she is making giggly sounds and he just lost it. Water works galore!!! It isn't that I like to see him immasculated or anything like that. It's that I get to see him human. I have never dated a man that actually showed his emotions-mind you it takes a really special occasion (like me giving birth to Amanda-he was more blubbery then me) but at least he can! So here is to all the men that aren't afraid to let their guard down every once in a while and shed a tear!!! Happy Father's Day Men!!!